A tradition on my LiveJournal is that anyone who finds a typo or mistake is entitled to a short bit of boykissing. How many of these do I have? A whole bunch… Remus/Severus, Remus/Sirius, and John/Rodney are the main ones, though I'm still weeding them out of my comments. It takes time! Er. I've made a lot of mistakes….
"Am I complaining?" Sirius said, leaning closer. "You promised me a kiss for every goal James scored on you." He wrapped one arm around Remus' shoulders and kissed him hard, ignoring Remus' embarassed flailing. "One..."
harsh, without mercy, lupine:
the bare whisper: "Mine."
Sirius: Er, no, what is i--MNPH! MNmn, mmmnph? Mm-ah....
Remus (slightly out of breath): Never mind, go back to your book.
"We're almost there."
"We've been hiking for what feels like an eternity now."
"There--just up there.... Isn't that glorious?"
"It's the sun, Lupin, it comes up every da--mnph!"
"I brought a sleeping bag."
"I'm not tired... oh!"
"Is your sleeping bag big enough for two?"
"I'm never friendly--just need to fuck you blind..."
"God!... That'll do--"
"Liar." He crossed the kitchen and wrapped his arms around Severus' waist. "You never told me could sing." He pushed Severus' hair aside and nuzzled his neck. "Do you know how incredibly sexy it is that you can sing?"
"I'm trying to make soup," Severus said, and put the knife down hastily as Remus kissed him, pushing him up against the counter.
"I find it very sexy," Remus said. "Sing some more to me."
Remus' hands unclenched from the sheet and latched onto Severus instead, with a grip that was nearly bruising.
"I dreampt you were dead," he said.
"I'm not," Severus said, and allowed Remus to pull him down into a kiss that catalogued all his signs of life: breath, pulse, warmth, will.
Remus pulled the pillow over his head and said something that sounded suspiciously like, "Don't want to."
"But you have to get up," Sirius said, pulling the pillow away, "we're leaving in fifteen minutes!"
Remus threw himself out of bed and said something unprintable.
"Good," Sirius purred, and yanked the sheet away. "Let's give them a show, eh?" And he stopped Remus' protests with his mouth, even as his hand slid lower....
"Ern-ph," his slumbering love replied, quite destroying the romantic atmosphere. "Nrm?"
As if drawn irresistibly to his tawny-haired boyfriend's sleep-swollen lips, Sirius bent and covered them gently with his own. Remus smiled in his sleep.
"Right, right... er... kiss of life, kiss of life... eeewww... You do it."
"Best two out of three.... Damn. Best four out of eight?"
"You're stupid sometimes, you know?"
"I think venilla's dead."
"Damn. Let's snog."
"Are you molesting me in my sleep?"
"'s just your nose, Moony," Sirius said, kissing it again.
Sirius slipped an arm around Remus' waist, under his coat, and pulled him so close that their hips rubbed as they walked. "'m sorry," he said. He tugged the umbrella down a bit and turned his head to kiss Remus hard and hungrily. Remus made a little noise into his mouth but kissed back for a sweet minute or two before pulling away.
"Sirius, we're on the high street," he said, and Sirius fancied he sounded regretful.
"Nobody's out in the rain. And besides, the umbrella," he said.
"You," Remus started. "You're rather diabolically clever, aren't you?"
"Yes," Sirius replied. "Let's go home."
Sirius (nuzzling his neck): But Moony, there are all kinds of things in here I'd like to try... (much frantic kissing ensues)
Remus: I still say no, Sirius.
Sirius: But it sounds dead easy: 'hete until ye can barely hold in it a finger, and kepe that hete'--how can that go wrong?
Remus: Hmm. I suppose you're right. I guess we could....
Sirius: A-ha, and you're already well heated....
Remus: AAHHH! I thought that was the... aaa... cookbook...
Sirius: Oh, darn, was I looking at the sex manual? Might as well stop, then.
Remus: Don't... you, oh my... dare....
Then he walked downstairs and through the front room to the kitchen. He drank a glass of water and turned the lights out. He checked that the door was locked.
Walking back to the stairs, he stopped to look at Remus, asleep on the couch. He straightened the quilts that were slipping off, and kissed Remus' forehead as well. He was turning to go upstairs when Remus spoke.
"Come back here--I'm sure you can do that better."
So he did.
"Damn! Put that back."
"'His amber eyes smouldered as he leant forward to consume my mouth with waves of succulent passion--'"
"Put the book down and consume my mouth."
"'--his insistent caresses awakened an animal in me--'"
"Fuck! You just burned a book."
"You're so cute when you smoulder. Kiss me."
"Those are the insistent caresses."
"They certainly are. I wanted to find out what happened in the story."
... "Let me show you..."
"Look, snow!" Sirius said, and was heading outside without coat or shoes when Remus collared him.
"Coat," Remus said; Sirius kissed him hard, pushing him up against the wall. "Shoes," he continued, when he could get his breath back.
"Yes, mum," Sirius said, and somehow Remus couldn't help thinking this was very, very wrong.
"It's an experiment," Sirius said. "I want to see how many times I have to kiss you to make your eyes change colour."
"It won't work."
Sirius grabbed him and kissed him again, one hand tangling in his hair and the other sliding down Remus' neck, teasing a nipple, circling his navel, and finally catching waistband of his pyjamas. Remus made a little noise, and Sirius pulled back.
"There, it worked."
He turned Remus so he could see his own eyes in the mirror; but any protest Remus might have had was lost in what Sirius did nest.
Sirius' shoulders twitched. "Uff 'iskits?"
"Those were mine!"
Sirius fished a largish piece out of his mouth. "Want some?"
Remus glared. "You drive me mad."
"Aw, Moony." Sirius wrapped his arms around Remus' waist and pulled him close. "I'm sorry. Let me make it up to you?" He kissed Remus, gently teasing his mouth open with his tongue. Remus groaned and tangled his hands in Sirius' hair.
Some minutes later....
"You can stop now, Moony," Sirius said through lips startin to go numb.
"Shut up. I'm trying to get my sugar fix," Remus said, and attacked him again.
"I 'snigged' you."
"... do it again?"
"Don't ever leave me," he said, and Remus laughed.
That was how he woke up in his solitary bed: with the memory of Remus' laughter in his ears and cold tears on his face.
"Harry says it's a game," Sirius said tersely as the little animated blob died yet again. "Bugger."
"Poor you," Remus said, pushing Sirius' hair up and doing things to his ear that made Sirius' pulse race. "Ah--you dropped Harry's game."
"I like your games better," he said, and turned to kiss Remus hard.
"I've never met anyone who enjoyed snigging as much as you do."
"Bloody hell, do that again--"
Sirius peered around the bathroom door. "The lily pads are a nice touch."
Remus glared at him balefully. "I want a shower."
Sirius grabbed Remus by his trouser's waistband and pulled him close. "We could go skinny dipping in the pool," he said, and kissed him, pushing Remus back as he kept his hands around his waist. "You know you want to."
Remus stared up at him with dilated eyes. "We could just move the frog spawn into the pool."
Sirius kissed him again, until Remus was limp and breathless. "Where's the fun in that?"
"Kiss me now, Remus, I'm ready!"
Remus found the stockings
and also the lacy black teddy.
Remus jumped and shoved something under his pillow. "Go back to sleep."
Severus rolled over and claimed Remus' mouth. He knew Remus, knew how to tease and torture him exquisitely with his mouth. He felt the tension and then the moment of surrender as Remus turned to mold his body to his. Severus reached under the pillow and was examining the calendar with interest before Remus could formulate a protest.
"A calendar, Remus?" he drawled, and Remus made small desperate noises against his chest.
"Just checking," Remus mumbled.
Severus didn't know whether he was amused or outraged. "Seeing whose birthday comes next?"
"Live a little, Moony," Sirius said, smiling casually as the receptionist glanced over.
"Sirius, I want this job."
"Give me a kiss and I'll leave you alone," Sirius said. Remus gave him a long, black look and then leant just barely over and brushed his lips over Sirius'.
"Actually, Peter, I'm the Dark Lord."
"Heh heh heh. And I'm a rat!"
"Ah... No, really."
"Er... Me, too."
"I'll hold your hand," Sirius says, and makes good use of the complementary blankets.
"That's not my hand, Sirius," Remus says, failing to not look alarmed.
"Had to see if that trouble getting it up was catching."
"It's not. You can stop checking now," Remus says, knuckles whitening as his hands clenched on the armrests.
"Kiss me," Sirius says, low and mischevious; and Remus does.
"Onions," Remus agreed, dropping three into the basket. Severus crossed it off the list.
"One kiss--wait a...mnph!"
"Heh. Wait'll you see what it's charmed to give me in aisle three."
"Kissing it to make it better."
"Idiot! My hands are covered with one of the most powerful aphrodisiacs known to man! Undiluted!"
"Bed, Severus. Now."
"Charming the roof off our bathroom is not the same as visiting the rotenburo (outdoors hot spring), Lupin."
"More privacy this way," Remus said, and kissed Severus as he slipped off his yukata.
"Mnh," Severus said: he was sleepy enough not to be able to form words, but not too sleepy to kiss Remus back. After a few minutes, in which his arms woke up and went around Remus, and followed by other bits also greeting the morning, he pulled back. "Ready for another go?"
"I'm hungry," Remus said plaintively.
Severus handed him the lube. "Take your vitamins."
Severus shuddered. "I wish you'd stop calling them that."
"The important thing is that they're not here." Remus's hands slid down Severus' chest, undoing buttons. When he ran out of buttons, he tugged the shirt off and let it fall to the floor as he began working on belt and trousers. Severus grabbed his hands and held them firmly.
"We have a bedroom, you know."
Remus allowed himself to be towed, in a manner less likely to be described as docile than predatory, into the bedroom. Severus let go his hands to weave his fingers through his hair and pull him into a kiss that left both of them breathless and without trousers.
"You don't suppose he... heard anything--do you?"
Severus shrugged. "He's a Weasley, he must be used to it by now."
"Do you suppose Arthur's screaming orgasms have anything on yours?"
Severus leant over and kissed Remus to stop all ruminations about orgasmic Weasleys and to get the bit of jam on his upper lip that had been distracting him. "I'll work on the silencing spell."
Remus coughed. It sounded a little like norinare.
Severus' robes crinkled alarmingly: as he reached for his wand, they ripped with a delightful crunkly sound. Remus looked up, wiped his eyes, and then beamed.
"Are we rolling sushi then? How delightful! You are full of surprises, Severus." And he conjured up a large bowl of rice and vegetables, ripped off a large piece of Severus' sleeve, and rolled a cucumber maki with practiced ease. "Here," he offered, holding it out to Severus with a leer as if brandishing a dildo, "have a bite."
"I think Snape and Lupin have gone," Julian said, appearing at Percy's elbow.
Percy blinked. "Gone where?"
Julian took Percy's plate and set it on the table. "Home to shag, most likely. Come dance."
Julian was an excellent dancer; Percy must have been more than a little drunk, because he found himself hanging onto Julian desperately to keep his balance. Julian took that as a hint and kissed him until the song ended and they broke apart, breathless.
"We should go home to shag," Julian said. Percy raised an eyebrow.
"My sister caught Snape and Lupin in the broom cupboard yesterday," he said. "Nell's occupied...."
A slow, wicked grin spread over Julian's face. He grabbed Percy's hand and dragged him out of the hall.
"Er," Percy said, knowing his sister all too well.
"Just you've got a bit of a... right here... there, you can cover it with your collar. And let me just Vanish that dust, shall I?"
"What did your sister want?" Julian asked, licking cake crumbs from his upper lip.
"You know bloody well," Percy said, but he couldn't help smiling at Julian's wide-eyed, injured look. "You're just lucky she can't see your love bites."
"Well," Julian said philosophically, "it's not as if they're in any place I could show her without Aurors arresting me for indecent exposure. But if it's any comfort, I doubt I'll be able to sit down for days."
"Poor baby," Percy said, smugly.
"I doubt it," Remus said, drinking too fast, getting bubbles up his nose, and sneezing.
"Do you feel any different?"
Remus looked up. "Yes," he said, but didn't elaborate. "Come here." He waited until Severus sat down next to him. "Do you?"
Severus kissed him. "Yes."
The theatre was half-empty; they sat in the very back, high up and hidden. The film fascinated Sirius: he wasn't sure if it was about Muggles or wizards, but the big automobiles that went flying around the stars were terrifically exciting. He grabbed Remus' hand when the baddie menaced, and Remus snorted laughter into his hand.
Sirius pulled Remus over and kissed him, with the thrill of doing something forbidden and dangerous. He felt Remus' breathing speed up, but Remus didn't pull away.
They kissed for most of the rest of the film.
When James pumped Sirius for information later that night, Sirius was unable to recall anything beyond the spaceships (you idiot, Sirius, he heard Remus laughing, those aren't cars) and the swords. However, after James took Lily, Sirius discovered to his horror that he got hard every time someone said May the Force be with you.
"It's all your fault," he told Remus, who laughed and kissed him and laughed at him some more.
"I can't help it -- I've an oral fixation."
"I'll help you. Look."
"Agh! You tossed my fags in the fire!"
"Good riddance. Now -- the next step is -- "
"Oh! Do that -- yes -- again, oh, please -- "
"Not so fast. Come here, Mr Oral Fixation."
... "You had this in mind all along, didn't you?"
"I did?... Mm. Oh. Yes. Ah. Ee! Teeth, Moony, teeth!"
"Bear with me," Remus said, attaching the second stocking to the suspenders and resting back on his heels to admire the view.
"I can't breathe," Severus said.
"Good." Remus grinned and ducked his head between the silk covering Severus' thighs.
Severus was far more breathless by the time Remus was done.
"I might ravish you."
"I can live with that."
"You're wearing doughnuts on your ears."
... "Fine. I'll ask Hagrid."
"No, no! -- come back here --"
"My, you're grumpy," Remus said, straddling the chair and incidentally Severus' legs. He tipped Severus' chin up and kissed him. "Everyone should try at least once."
"No," Severus said, muffled by Remus' mouth again.
"For me?" Remus asked, looking down with love and trust, and Severus felt his resolve give way.
"Once. For you," he said, and Remus rewarded him with another kiss.